What the #/!!@#?

In the years after my deeper conversion and commitment to Catholicism, I made a lot of changes in my behavior, and still do so. Some changes I struggle with, some were fairly easy to change, with God’s help.

One of those “easy to change” behaviors was cursing. I never cursed like a sailor or anything like that, so I think that was one reason that I didn’t have a really hard time stopping.

Now, I will admittedly still let the occasional “a-hole” fly out of my mouth (or not so occasional as E claims, he says it’s my favorite word, but I think he also exaggerates. He monitors my language very closely and gives me horribly disapproving looks when I say anything out of line—he curses even less than I do, so I guess he’s a good one to be the monitor. He also monitors my pronunciation and usage of all words on the day to day, but that’s for another post). I can’t tell you the last time I said the mother of all curse words.

I am not offended when I hear other people curse here and there, if anything, it’s just something that I personally see as an unattractive trait (and that goes for both men and women).

When someone curses all the time, I feel like there is some reason why this person must feel like they need to go there and stay there, so to speak. It’s as if they have a difficult time finding another way to express themselves in real words, so they resort to cursing, or they are feeling anger/resentment/you name it and they have no other way to get it out.

I say all of this because I was very struck by this when I went to see Jarred on Saturday. He curses a lot without even batting an eye. Now, I’m not judging him at all, he certainly isn’t the only person I know and love who does so, and again, HE didn’t bat an eye. I, on the other hand, could feel myself visibly flinch when he would say some of the words he chose.

Weird, isn’t it? I tried to think of why I never noticed it before—I have known him since I was 5 (but he didn’t curse back then!) and although I may not literally see him often, we do speak often enough that I should be used to what words he chooses—so why did it take him moving away for me to notice his language? Maybe some people curse more in person than on the phone? My reaction was also interesting to me—when some people curse I don’t even think twice and with him I was literally flinching—maybe because I don’t expect him to?

Anyway, despite all that :) it was really great to see Jarred and spend time with him on his new turf. He is hanging in there and looking for a new job. He is open to winding up wherever the new job is—even if that means moving again so soon. Please keep him in your prayers.

Happy birthday to Kathy today. Please say a prayer for the birthday girl as well.